STOP PRESS:
I’m delighted to announce that this site has won a Blog of the Day Award for 29th April 2008.
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The next morning, on our first day home, we returned to St Peter’s so that the doctors could examine Jenny.
They smiled thinly, but didn’t say very much, just telling us to await some improvement. Jenny took home a more powerful painkiller, Coproximol, and a new anti-oestrogen drug called Megestrol which would act to block the growth of cancer cells.
I didn’t know what to say to Jenny, since no real answers had been given, nor any solutions found. I think we both simply tried to blank it out as one more hospital visit over, and to carry on as best we could.
The following weekend, just before my dad’s brain tumour operation, we visited my folks for a family reunion in Stratford.
My sister and her family were there, and my uncle had made the trip from Florida, too. We had a wonderful gathering, with all of us knowing it might be the last time that we could be together.
Fortunately, my dad’s operation went well. It took him several months to get back to any sense of normality, and many more to regain his full strength. But he was making progress, which Jenny surely wasn’t.
I think he suffered, mentally, during those months of his recovery and Jenny’s decline.
Maybe he felt some survivor’s guilt, or had his fears amplified by seeing Jenny’s health deteriorate. But he was still there, and he was moving forwards.
A week or so later, and with her discomfort now back under control, Jenny went back to work in west London. It was such a brave thing to do. Returning to work should have signalled the end of her maternity leave and a clean bill of health.
We knew it was nothing like that, but Jenny said that if she couldn’t fix it yet, she’d just have to work through it for now. She wasn’t being realistic, I knew, but I wasn’t going to stand in her way.
Because whatever I thought about the wisdom of her going back to work, Jenny’s wishes meant more to me than anything then.
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12 responses so far ↓
quotes // April 29, 2008 at 8:56 pm
Your site has won a Blog of the Day Award (BOTDA)
Thank you - famous quotes
Roads // April 29, 2008 at 11:26 pm
Many thanks, quotes. That’s very kind and much appreciated.
ellaella // April 30, 2008 at 12:22 pm
Well-deserved!
Roads // April 30, 2008 at 2:48 pm
Thanks very much, Ella. I see you’ve won this award as well.
I’m in good company!
shadowlands1501 // May 1, 2008 at 12:49 am
Congrats on your award, Roads. You deserve this and many more.
Your Jenny’s determination was so remarkable…
“Because whatever I thought about the wisdom of her going back to work, Jenny’s wishes meant more to me than anything then.” There is nothing more important than making their wishes come true.
That is what I purpose on a daily basis.
It was his wish to have our vows renewed in church. It was his wish to travel to be with his daughter and spend time with his new grandson. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks or whatever great wisdom there is, only the wishes matter most…
Roads // May 1, 2008 at 9:59 am
“There is nothing more important than making their wishes come true.”
That’s precisely right, Shadowlands - precisely right.
nichole3 // May 4, 2008 at 1:50 am
Roads,
Congratulations on your award. I’m sitting here tired and just catching up with a few bloggers. I woke up fast when I read your Jenny went back to work. I just can’t believe that she had the strength to do that. But perhaps that is what kept her going.
Nichole from Kentucky
Roads // May 4, 2008 at 3:17 pm
Thank you, Nichole, and enjoy your Kentucky Derby weekend. I hope the bluegrass is shimmering in the sunshine. Meanwhile, we have our own (Epsom) Derby on the first Friday in June.
Yes, it amazed me that Jenny wanted to go back to her job. She enjoyed working as a geologist (as I do), she loved the social contact and all the warm-hearted banter of being in the office, and - even more importantly, I think it gave her something else to think about and a whole different set of questions to fill her mind just then.
The temptation to stop working in times of poor health must be strong, but it’s amazing how many people go to great lengths to soldier on as best they can, even when they’re ill. That’s because simply doing what we do is so important to our well-being - it’s much underrated as a means of providing stability through difficult times, I think.
Many thanks again, and all best wishes from London.
Author // May 5, 2008 at 4:15 pm
Well done - a much deserved award!
Roads // May 5, 2008 at 8:17 pm
Many thanks, Jan.
Louise // May 7, 2008 at 6:29 am
Well done, Roads, for the award - most deserved. With all the moving, I haven’t been reading blogs recently and got in a flap as I had three chapters to catch up on - but as you see I made it! How are publishing plans coming on?
Greetings from a hot and sunny Brussels (is this our summer?!).
Roads // May 7, 2008 at 7:58 pm
Many thanks, Louise - it’s great to hear from you and I’m glad life is treating you well. And I’ll spare you the jokes about cooking Brussels…
Many thanks for asking about the book. There’s real momentum building here - reader numbers continue to rise (closing on 25,000 now) and the site is regularly featured on the WordPress.com front page these days.
That’s timely, since the book is out with a publisher at the moment. I’ll keep you posted. Fingers crossed, and thanks again for your support.
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